We’ve all seen them. Maybe we’ve been one of them.
Walking down the grocery store isle, trying to decide what we need, what we can afford and what we can’t live without. Up comes little Julie or Johnny with a special treat in hand.
Mom, Dad can we get this?
No not today honey.
Awe come on can’t we get it just once?
No you don’t need that, now put it back.
Awe come on we never get anything I want!
No, I said no, now put it back.
Please, please, please can I have it?
Oh all right, now put it in the cart and let’s go.
Sound familiar? Probably, because it happens every day all over the world.
Now it‘s OK, as a parent, to change our mind every once in a while. However if we continue this behavior, over time, we show our children that our word, and our mind, can be changed if they whine and complain loud and long enough.
Then our children will begin to manipulate each situation to favor their interests. When this goes on long enough they will eventually become known as a spoiled rotten brat.
Let you No be No and your Yes be Yes
There is a scripture where Jesus teaches the importance of not being wishy-washy, “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” (Matthew 5:37 NKJV).
I believe he was stating here both the importance of being a person of your word, and not stooping to worthless oaths to prove you are telling the truth. You know when you were a kid and you said something like. “What I said is true, I swear on my mother’s grave…” This same principal is vital when it comes to not raising spoiled children.
My favorite response to my children’s attempt to get their own way was to say “How many times do I have to say no!” The right answer of course was…. One Time!
1. Our children need to be assured that we will keep our word.
When we tell them yes or no, we need to stand by our decisions. It’s a shame how many broken relationships are caused by broken promises.
2. If our children can manipulate us, they will try to manipulate everything.
If we continue to change our mind, and not stand by our word, then our children will lose respect for us and eventually those around them. Remember what is learned in childhood is often taken into adulthood.
The easiest way to raise spoiled children: In conclusion
You would think that as parents we would realize the importance of our children not getting their way all the time. However it’s amazing how many children seem to know how to manipulate their parents. Its even more amazing how many times we give in, just to get them to behave properly. So next time you say no, stick to your guns, and when you say yes, make sure you keep your promise.
Remember that it’s way easier to raise a good behaved child than an ill behaved child, and there’s nothing more ill behaved than a spoiled child.